The Cracker

I stared at that cracker for a good twelve seconds before deciding not to touch it. I'm sure I passed it at least ten times throughout the day and I kept hoping someone else would notice it and pick it up. It was just so grotesque. A small, round relic of a sticky child with little manners. I could catch some kind of mysterious sickness from touching that cracker and I knew it! All kinds of dangers lurk around discarded food including but not limited to: influenza, measles, the plague, herpes, or worse the stupidity that infected the child who dropped it. I don't want to catch a customer's stupid so I ignore the cracker. Simple.

If I may though I'd like to rewind to the moment where the flaky little curse was dropped on the floor of The Bookstore. Where were the parents? Why did the little hellion have access to easily dropped foods? Maybe it would be safe to assume that CUSTOMERS... excuse me.. customers have no manners whatsoever and think that stores are a giant place mat for their child's unhealthy on-the-go snack attacks. Would you have me believe otherwise?

THEN YOU DEAL WITH THE CRACKER!

I just find it repulsive that employees of retail places have to clean up disgusting, half chewed, sketchy, and sometimes vile tidbits of peoples' eating disorders. Eat outside or something! Just DON'T BRING IT IN DOORS IF YOU CAN'T KEEP A GRIP ON YOUR FOOD.

Oh and to whoever thinks its cool to leave half finished coffee cups on the shelves in a bookstore.

WRONG. WRONG WRONG WRONG.

The Science Fiction section would like to thank one of you mopheads for the spilled cup of coffee that took the lives of six different books. Coffee ruins books people! Luckily the New Age section usually sees it coming and manages to stay dry, but that's the only exception.

When I see horrors like this it makes me want to dump some coffee on your car seat. HAVE YOU NO RESPECT? And if your excuse for not throwing your own trash away has anything to do with the distance you are from the nearest trash receptacle then maybe you shouldn't be consuming food anyway.

ATTENTION, UNRELATED TOPIC: If you brought your items to the register without a bag then why can't you take them to your car without one? YOU ARE KILLING THE PLANET YOU SELFISH BUNCH OF LARD BRAINS. Plastic bags clog the ground with unnecessary waste that NEVER TRULY DISINTEGRATE. Every time you use a bag you're enabling harm to the environment and if your dumb ass didn't notice THE ENVIRONMENT GIVES YOU THE FOOD YOU STUFF YOUR UGLY FACE WITH.

COME ON PEOPLE.

ATTENTION, RETURNING TO ORIGINAL POINT:Food and drinks are forbidden in some stores for a reason, so how about you SLOPPY PIG SNARKERS with your RAIN OF GOOEY SLOP go somewhere other than The Bookstore. I'd rather not spend my days scraping your slimy masticated waste off the floor. THANKS.

And have a nice evening. (Jerk.)